While writing this post, my emotions are all over the place.
My parents divorced when I was five years old. During my entire childhood, I was jealous of those who had two parents — and maybe even a sibling here or there. Instead, I grew up in a single parent household with a mom who could barely make ends meet. I watched her struggle. And I watched her give every ounce of love to me. Looking back now? Seeing my mom play the role of both parents made me a stronger woman.
Over the past two years, my mom has been playing the online dating game. Very few men ever made it to date number two. Apparently, she has incredibly high standards! You go, girl.
To be completely transparent, I found my mom’s dating life slightly comical. Here was my fifty-five year old mom purchasing lingerie and talking about sexy (old) men.
Little did I know, the joke was on me.
HE PUT A RING ON IT.
My mom got engaged after dating a guy for about nine months. I like the guy. He is very nice, treats my children wonderfully, and clearly loves my mom. You might think all that would settle my mind and give me confidence in their upcoming marriage. But it doesn’t.
Uncertainty fills my mind every time I think about it. I just don’t want to see my mom hurt again. I also worry that she is too independent. She likes things a certain way, which makes sense. She’s lived alone for nine years. And being fifty-five years old has to mean that they each have fifty-five years’ worth of baggage. He has to have some skeletons in his closet, right?
Discovering his role in my kids life? Also very difficult. Do we call him grandpa? Do we give him a cutesy nickname? Trusting another man around my kids? Challenging. Since two of my children are boys, he will likely become a huge influence to them.
I am thrilled that my mom has someone to take care of her. It has taken so much pressure off of me. I know it’s a little selfish to say, but I don’t feel like I have to worry about her nearly as much. However, I do miss seeing her. I haven’t actually been alone with my mom in months. Her world once revolved around me.
This has been such a crazy adjustment. But I figured there has to be someone else out there whose mom is getting married too.
My mom passed away 9 years ago. My dad just remarried about 2 years ago. I am 35 they are in their 70’s. I have an incredibly hard time calling her my step mom (I’m 35 not 12) so we all just call her by her name (I have 3 young boys). It’s been going well though it still feels strange. Good luck!
Have confidence in her abilities. She raised you, so that should prove she can made sound judgements.